Looking for the perfect gift for the person who farts on Zoom? For your brother-in-law who won’t shut the door? For the friend who treats every public restroom like a hostage negotiation?
Congratulations. You’ve found it.
Turd Words is a wildly inappropriate, culturally confused, and highly informative field guide to bathroom slang, global toilet customs, and bodily betrayal. Part dictionary, part travel log, and 100% uncalled for, it includes:
- 100+ poop-related terms from around the world
- Short stories featuring yaks, tactical turtleheads, haunted porta-potties & emotional bidets
- Field-tested terms like “crapquake,” “toilet sniper,” “phantom pooper,” and “shartnado”
Perfect for:
Stocking stuffers
White elephant exchanges
Guests who overstay in your bathroom
Travelers, veterans, new parents, and immature uncles everywhere
Written by fictional “poop-thropologist” R.J. “Rusty” Clench, Turd Words is equal parts glossary, gag gift, and gastrointestinal group therapy.
Everyone poops. Now YOU can sound clever while talking about it.
